Weekly Journal – January 21, 2018

This week has been a pretty stressful week for me but it has also been exciting.  It can be tough when there are such emotional mood swings but thankfully my prior work with a counselor has really helped me manage those swings.  I don’t let my depression and anxiety control me anymore.

I feel like I have learned a lot over the past couple months.  Life is full of little lessons and I have been realizing a lot of them lately.  I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason and people or opportunities enter our life when they are supposed to.  Whether it is permanently or just for a period of time, there is usually something to learn from if you take a look.

For me it has been with people.  I have realized I need to be better in relationships with people.  I wrote about it in this blog if you are interested in reading.  Taking a bit of time to reflect (thankfully not overthinking the issue) on the people I met this past year and how those encounters played out has taught me a lot.  Definitely thank for all the encounters and what I learned.  I think it will really help me going forward.

I love that I am constantly becoming a better version of me!!!

improve yourself
Family

The week started with my mom telling me they think my 100 year old grandma had a mini stroke.  She had a pretty bad day with one side not functioning very well and she didn’t want to get out of bed.  Given the fact that I am a 3 hour flight and then a 3 hour drive to get to where she is, I have accepted that each time I say good bye to her, it might be the last time I do so.  It isn’t something that I am really good with but it is a reality.  I was very close to her when I was growing up and I have a lot of wonderful memories.  Thankfully she has had a couple of decent days since so fingers crossed she continues to improve.

Work

Work has been crazy busy and I find myself spending evenings working.  I don’t mind doing it but with other things going on, and this flu bug still draining my energy, I would prefer to have some more chill days where I can just focus on my own work and then go home at 4:30.  Once I kind of get caught up I think it should be better.

Interview Process

The exciting part of the week was getting a phone call telling me I have advanced to the next stage of a job interview.  While it is exciting, I found out the next stage is an interview and two presentations!  Geez!  So I have spent this weekend working on the information I need to put together for that.  Also it takes an afternoon of work so it puts me further behind.  Having said that, I am excited for the challenge and I really think these experiences are amazing for my development.

To put it into perspective, when I was struggling with depression and anxiety, there was NOOOOO chance I would have put myself into this position and if I did, I would probably back out due to the anxiety.  I am so happy to no longer be in that place.  Yes I will still be nervous and anxious on the day but that is because I really hope I am able to get this job.  I get the feeling it will be a good opportunity for me.  Keeping the positive thoughts going that I can nail this interview!

Volunteering

Of course as I am busy with work and this interview process, things pick up with the charity I volunteer with.  We are in the process of hiring an executive director.  There have been a lot of issues related to this but it has been a good experience to be on the hiring committee.  Seems I have been on both sides of the table a lot lately!

Things I am grateful for

My Grandma.  Without question, my life has been so much better because of this woman.  I miss all of my grand parents equally but she is the last one alive and one that I have had the closest relationship with.  Her life has been remarkable and I am lucky to have had her in my life for so long.  She has literally been there since I was born (she helped deliver me).

My ability to recognize where I am wrong.  It might take me a bit to get there.  I may overwhelm or annoy some people along the way but I am seeing my faults and I am correcting them.  That being the key….the willingness and desire to be better.  Before, I would have just said whatever and tried my best to cope.

Everything around me.  There are times I complain about such stupid stuff and then I sit on my comfy couch, watch a big tv, and chill out in my comfortable condo.  I have tried to be more grateful for the situation I find myself in.  Life could be so much more difficult and I could have a lot less so really, what do I have to complain about.

Meditation

I am going to start meditating this week.  Not sure how this will go but I have read a lot about it lately and seems to really be something successful people swear by.  I have always had a very busy mind so I am not sure how it will go. Trying to be more mindful can’t be a bad thing.  Will write about it and then update the blog as I try.

Time to sign off.  Thanks for reading if you did…please feel free to comment if anything interested you.  Here is a link to my previous weekly journal.

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